Tuesday, December 11, 2007

IED

Acronyms, so many meanings for so few letters. Here, now, tonight, typing with my thumb on my phone to force a slow pace, it's explosive alright and intermittent but it's not a device it's a disorder. Like my "lysdexia" only a "reasonable accommodation" is possible never victory, never recovery. The dyslexia was reasonably accommodated in some serendipitous ways beginning at the age of four in 1951 when my father who had been teaching me to read using phonics discovered, much to his displeasure, that I could not read sentences of more than two or at most three words. After several visits to various extended family members who were teachers and the pediatrician it was decided that perhaps the best thing to do was to place me in school as soon as possible and hope that I either caught on in the hands of professionals or if necessary caught up by repeating the first few grades as often as required. The September before my fifth birthday in November I was placed in a private kindergarten and then the September before my sixth birthday I went into the first grade with the Sisters of the Sacred Heart at St Mary's School. In every room at St Mary's there was a placard above the front blackboard with the caption
Read it, Say it, Write it and Know it

displayed beneath a lithograph, some Renaissance Master's work I suppose, depicting a toddler Jesus, Mary and Joseph in the traditional family pose with Joseph standing behind a seated Mary, Jesus in Mary's lap and both Mary and Joseph looking down beneath their halos at the three or four year old Jesus who stared with the Deity's omniscient eyes straight out at the viewer. We did lots of oral recitation as a group and lots of "read it, say it, write it" individually in school and at home. By the sixth grade most traces of dyslexia were not manifest as long as I kept to the program which was simply lots of drill in the old method, filling reams of paper with my work. Eight years with the nuns and this method seemed to do the trick. By my senior year in a public High School I came out of the middle of my graduating class with ninetieth percentile SAT's and advanced placement in English, Russian, French and Math. I went on in the space of the next twenty years through a complete baccalaureate program in Biochemistry but never graduating, did two years of graduate work in Physiology and Pharmacology and later actually earned a BS in Computer Science, the only actual degree. No one seems to know but me and perhaps my writing coach of these last ten years who has simply been patient, leaned on me hard to straighten out my tangled thoughts and never even suggested the obvious. So reasonable accommodation is possible in one area at least. But, with Intermittent Explosive Disorder reasonable accommodation seemed to be at best at the tender age of sixty still a distant and perhaps unachievable goal until today. The U S Navy, from which I am now officially retired, innumerable hospital laboratory jobs, countless outside sales jobs, marriages and sundry other relationships have all at one time or another fallen victim to IED. Today the current position as a mechanized mahoot nearly became a casualty due to my extreme displeasure over some rather long repair delays, I'm still here waiting on repairs nearly twenty four hours after the problems erupted. Repairs that could have been avoided if some timely action had been taken earlier as I suggested. I would have exploded and walked off this morning if it were not for a few kind words from a very insightful site manager who himself has many of the same opinions about our company as I do. My site manager, who if he hasn't had training as a counselor or analyst certainly seems to have the skills, simply dissuaded me from taking a rent car and going home by saying that perhaps things would work out today if I just gave it all some more time and that often he had the same urge recently but has restrained himself and found a good result in most cases, if not exactly the result he wanted at least better than things were before. His opening statement in response to my question as to what would be the best cab company to use to pick up my rent car was, "Oh, that's not necessary I'll have someone drive you. Are you going on vacation?" My site manager has been placed in one of my company's major locations as a trouble shooter to straighten out a few wrinkles that have developed over the years. This fellow, my site manager, who grew up in Germany but has only the slightest trace of not having had English as a first language, is a shining example of how respect is earned not demanded. He is firm but sympathetic, an excellent listener but not incapable of giving orders and expecting them to be carried out. He is renowned among the longer term employees as a fair, straight talking guy who can get things done. It was in that vein that he presented his suggestion this morning that I just wait a bit, not quite an imperative but a soft command that might best be followed. Where was this fellow in all the other jobs and situations in the past when I needed him? Perhaps the old Zen aphorism, "The teacher arrives when the student is ready", has come to me in the flesh. Perhaps, just perhaps, some reasonable accommodation with IED is possible before we take the dirt nap. No big boom today, thank God and my site manager. Onward ever onward and upward, nearer my God to Thee. Wonder what happens if you write "JMJ" in the notes section of the daily log? Perhaps the nuns were right
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 'In your anger do not sin' Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
their method seemed to work before. A good manager, everyone needs a good manager. What do those troublesome Pentecostals always say, "Let go and let God." Hmm. Hmm, indeed.

Friday, November 30, 2007

All the correct connections

Tired of right and left, red and blue, well, try connecting correctly for a change to good solid thinking about some political issues, try

Friday Fronts: David Cole on Jack Goldsmith on The Daily Blague

and don't forget to try the PodCast.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Thawing out

Idling away the morning folding laundry and watching Iceman on AMC. Took my road bud back to his truck around six, came back home and took Pelé to school around seven, came back home again and began on the INet with The Solar Queen's new notebook, Compaq Presario C727, where the keyboard is just too small for my hands. On mine now, my laptop, Compaq Presario V6171CL, a bigger screen and a much larger and more comfortable keyboard. I don't think anyone truly understood the real meaning of "personal computer" until the advent of laptops, notebooks and handhelds or smartphones, they are for me truly an extension of my being. The physical devices themselves, my smartphone and my laptop are so personal, so known to me in their look and feel that they are like my shoes or my truck, they are in every sense mine and I am as uncomfortable using someone else's as I would be wearing someone else's shoes even if they were the same size and a proper fit. Iceman has been taken down now by The Solar Queen's preprogrammed recording of Democracy Now on Free SpeechTV with Amy Goodman. I'll dump Amy in a minute and probably hear about it later tonight but for now I just marvel at the marketing in play here with Amy's physical appearance and apparent left sided vagus nerve compression, she has all the signs of a mild case of Bell's Palsy to me. God forbid that she has Ramsey Hunt syndrome, not nice. Amy looks like a Mennonite or Amish woman in the privacy of her own room, plain straight unstyled hair, no visible makeup and certainly "plain dress". The content is not remarkable just the presentation format, image and marketing, it is all image and marketing. Style is everything they say, different styles for different marketing niches, I suppose. Where will all this fragmentation end or better yet lead us? Trent Lott is on now with video that was done on a cell phone or some lo res video but fairly high res audio device, it is noted in the upper right hand screen corner as " live on 26 Nov." Back to Iceman and soon back to my road truck to retrieve my own power adaptor for my laptop, I robbed The Solar Queen's just a moment ago to power up my laptop which had gone completely battery dead in "hibernate mode" since I last closed the lid on the road truck probably the day arrived here back on Wednesday before Thanksgiving. As I say, I have no one except Pelé to simply to talk with and he does a fine job within the limits of his small but ever expanding and developing realm. I try not to stretch him too far too soon. I suppose I talk to a lot of people daily but all within the bounds of the particular social context, fuel desk clerks, counter clerks at the food shops, drivers on the radio, my company's administrative staff on the phone, my shipper's and receiver's personnel on the phone and in person. Sort of an "open prison" I'm in it seems. Well, enough I'm sure, you have a life. This is in many ways the same stream of consciousness, the conversational monologue, if you will, reduced to writing that I was so prone to write for you three or four years ago but it seems more readable now. Not much better content but more readable. Perhaps we are on the way to really learning to write readable interior monologues for a larger and more organized narrative, a short story perhaps. But only perhaps, so many things stand in the way, mood, my personal mood and the time remaining in a lifetime not being the least of the obstacles.

I'm going to copy this to Quezon, if only to provoke an email conversation. I have other email to answer from him and will do the answering by one thirty when I have to leave to pick Pelé up from school. Pelé could, I suppose, ride the bus but we have fallen into the habit of my taking him and picking him up when I'm at home and able.

I feel a certain kinship with poor old Charlie, the defrosted Neanderthal, in Iceman. How long have I been thawed out now, thawed out in terms of relationships, loving or physical - it really doesn't matter at this point, physical will do - with other humans of my kind? What are my kind, I wonder?

Quezon has included in the email that I need to answer this morning a very well worded rant about his dissatisfaction, and the general dissatifaction of many educated Filipinos, with his country and culture. I will ask if I can excerpt that part and foward it to BoozWha for his comments to both of us.

Have a pleasant day. My phone is on and with me. Call, write or come by.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Tricks of the trade

How do I send email to someones cell phone?

Well, Bubba, here's how, at least for a number of CSP's that I've used successfully.

You have to know your recepient's CSP and then address the email to their "10digitphonenumber @ CSP MessagingPortal".


For example, for a Verizon cell phone whose number is 7135551212 use 7135551212@vtext.com.

Verizon: @vtext.com
Former AT&T customers: @mmode.com
Sprint: @messaging.sprintpcs.com
T-Mobile: @tmomail.net
Nextel: @messaging.nextel.com
Cingular: @cingularme.com
Virgin Mobile: @vmobl.com
Alltel: @alltelmessage.com OR @message.alltel.com
CellularOne: @mobile.celloneusa.com
Omnipoint: @omnipointpcs.com
Qwest: @qwestmp.com

Remember, any charges incured and the way messages are
delivered and displayed depends on the wireless device and service
plan.

How cozy

How cozy and it will be that way for quite sometime in fact for evermore it would seem
2. Supporting the Republic of Iraq in its efforts to combat all terrorist groups, at the forefront of which is Al-Qaeda, Saddamists, and all other outlaw groups regardless of affiliation, and destroy their logistical networks and their sources of finance, and defeat and uproot them from Iraq. This support will be provided consistent with mechanisms and arrangements to be established in the bilateral cooperation agreements mentioned herein. 3. Supporting the Republic of Iraq in training, equipping, and arming the Iraqi Security Forces to enable them to protect Iraq and all its peoples, and completing the building of its administrative systems, in accordance with the request of the Iraqi government. ~read more~

I try to restrain myself from drinking this early in the morning but this morning I just might relent. Won't someone, please, rid us of these troublesome NeoCons! And, the sooner the better. Where are Lee Harvey, James Earl or Charles when we really need them or is that just the way crazy people do things? Why surely no one would go out and create a stable of the unstable just in case no one might need to push them over the edge. Pushed of course in the right direction over the right edge. Well, let's not pursue this line of speculation lest the professional speculators send their cretinous goons out to talk to us, eh.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Trouble, we ain't got no trouble. None!


Sidiki Conde lost the use of his legs at the age of 14. In Guinea, where he was raised, the handicapped are looked at with suspicion and fear. In an effort to fit in with his culture, Sidiki learned to dance on his hands. He now performs as a dancer and teaches other wheelchair users to do the same. This pod is set in Miami, Florida and follows several people in wheelchairs as they prepare to perform in public. ~read & see more~

Friday, November 23, 2007

Doesn't hurt my eyes any, no not at all.

Now the heart, well, that remains to be seen. I would rather sail through a storm or two than stand on the pier. Every storm comes between long periods calm seas and fair winds. Looks like a pair of very rosy sunsets to me. With any luck there will be no red dawn, least wise nothing we can't handle. Ain't that right there, Quezon, ain't that right? And, me mate, Quezon, he said,"Try oranges." Funny fellow, Quezon, perhaps too much Curacao in his coffee lately. And so, Quezon and I have put out to test the seas again. How does it go
If you smile at me
I will understand
'Cause that is something
Everybody everywhere does in the same language
Something about wooden ships on the water as I recall, very free and easy I believe it went. Oh yes,
Go take a sister, then, by the hand
Lead her away from this foreign land
Far away, where we might laugh again
We are leaving, you don't need us

And it's a fair wind
Blowin' warm out of the south over my shoulder
Guess I'll set a course and go
I'm sure David will forgive me this lifting, he got it so right, so very free and easy.

Such a sweet sound to my ears

Aggies top Longhorns!

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Tidbits

From The New York Times
Op-Ed Contributor
Catch Me, I’m Falling
By SAMUEL I. SCHWARTZ
Published: August 13, 2007
THE horrific collapse of the Interstate 35W bridge in Minneapolis was but one more in the history of infrastructure failures, and I’m afraid it will be old news soon. In 1967, during the busy Christmas shopping season, the Silver Bridge over the Ohio River between Point Pleasant, W.Va., and Gallipolis, Ohio, collapsed, plunging scores of people into the river and killing 46. During my nearly 20 years as an engineer with the New York City Department of Transportation, I witnessed ~read more~

"Money is like manure, it should be spread around." - Brooke ( Russell Kuser Marshall ) Astor, 30Mar1902-13Aug2002. How do you properly list all the previous surnames w/o a narrative?

Jonis Agee, author of TheRiver Wife, related to James?


From Early Warning
Posted at 08:43 AM ET, 08/14/2007
Partisan Warfare
In the coming weeks, as Congress and the American public prepare for the testimony of Gen. David Petraeus on the progress of the surge in Iraq, we'll hear a lot about the value of "professional" military advice. As President Bush has said, Washington ought not substitute "the opinions of politicians for the judgments of our military commanders."
But are military officers, specifically flag officers (generals and admirals), also political partisans? Increasingly -- and sadly -- they are. More important, the brass is profoundly "political," which is to say that its recommendations and decisions are hardly ever made for purely tactical or operational reasons....continue >>

From The Biscuit Report
Think about that for a minute. There are people in this country who believe, when hired to screen out naughty language and naked people, that non-profane criticism of George Bush somehow qualifies. We live in a country where it's possible to have such a "misunderstanding".Bravo, Republicans! Bravo! Why make it an actual crime to criticize the Dear Leader when you can just convince people to censor the criticism as a matter of course?

All I need now is a scene to plant this dialog within
Someone asked me recently at party, "Do you believe in Bush?" Not wanting to start a political conversation, I coyly replied, "Busch? No, God, no! Don't you have Miller Lite? Or, Killian's Red, that would be great," while I tensed with angst not knowing if they would take the bait and go to the bar or press me further. They took me for drunk and wandered away. Then I felt a warm surge of relief wash over me like the surf, "Believe in Dubbya? Believe? George W Bush? Really! Certainly not! Believing in or believing Dubbya is so ludicrous it makes believing in God seem rational," and I felt much better.
That dialog is largely stolen and reworded from Ann Lamott in one of the last chapters of Plan B: FurtherThoughts on Faith. Ms Lamott reminds me of Laurie Beth Jones who brought me Jesus in Blue Jeans: A Practical Guide to Everyday Spirituality but Ann is far more accessible to me. Laurie and Ann and I could talk in the church lobby but only Ann and I could go out and have a beer - I would be the only one drinking, Ann quit - and talk about faith and fucking. Admirably for a committed Christian Ms Lamott despises GWB and weaves this desperation and her wrestling with the resulting depression throughout Plan B where she deals, in language appropriate to the the topic and her mood at the time, with her daily battles in life and how her particular faith has sustained and strengthened her. Lamott is never preachy and though you might not agree with her you will, like I have, want her on your Lunch Dates I'd Love to Have list. I suppose that I should disclose that I listen to most books and have listened to unabridged versions of the two linked here. Both Laurie and Ann have soothing voices for the road but Ann just draws me in when she recounts how the apostles must have felt in the upper room on Holy Saturday, "... in a room filled with clouds of cigarette smoke I see some really wigged out guys drinking a bit of wine and thinking to themselves, 'boy are we really fucked!'"


Joni and the Cheshire Cat

Warm as ice, cold as fire.
Bright as night, dark as day.
I've looked at
the Cheshire Cat that way.
But, still somehow
it's cat's illusions I have known,
I really don't know cat's at all.


Is it what it seems
the Cheshire Cat
the smile
the smile in my dreams?



Watch for Bubba meets the Zen Shrimper in Bubba's Bait & Sushi, coming soon.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

I'm back

Nearly a year since I've done any regular work here. Sometimes I feel like Amy, who commented on DB
Wow, how earnest and clever I was. And how utterly moribund Biscuit is. Every day I think to post on it, and then someone cries or yells "MOM, I need a box cutter and some glue!" and the moment is lost...

about not being able to tend to her blog because of her other responsibilities.

I am in Knoxville, TN since about eight my time, Central Daylight, last night when I fueled up and parked the truck to wait for my Monday morning delivery. It's a bit tight
here at one of the older and smaller Pilot truck stops on the west side of Knoxville along IH-40. After I fueled up I had to circle back out in the street, come back in the parking lot, and then I waited for another driver to squeeze his fifty three foot dry van into one of the only open parking spaces directly behind the fuel islands, and then he very kindly got out of his truck and "spotted me" to back into the space next to his truck. There is just barely enough room to do it, pulling up through the fuel island and backing up to "hit the hole" puts you within inches of several obstructions, various curbs which bruise the side walls of your tires, the fuel island pump, trucks in the adjoining parking spaces and all the while other trucks are backed up in the parking lot coming in to fuel and waiting for you to park. Once I had gotten my truck settled into the space I got out to thank the driver, Anthony, who helped me. Anthony and I talked about trucking and all manner of things standing in the parking lot from around nine Knoxville time until nearly midnight with one break to buy soft drinks. It's a solitary business this over the road trucking and personal face to face conversation of any merit does not come often nor last long. Last night was a very unusual occurrence, generally such conversations last only minutes and are pure ritual courtesy but in this case we hit it off for some reason. I know Anthony lives in Chicago on the lakefront downtown with his wife and children, some of his past work history back to Seattle, WA and that he is originally from a small town in Mississippi and he has a similar grasp of my life. It turns out that we are both veterans of the US Navy though our service dates a very far apart, he enlisted in 1989 and I enlisted in 1967. I never asked for Anthony's last name nor he mine and likely we will never see each other again, but if we do meet again, there will certainly be the basis for another friendly conversation of some depth. Anthony and I are both from the South. Perhaps it's a Southern thing not asking for nor giving a last name when you spend some time with another person in a chance meeting, it felt very familiar and comfortable to me. We both agree that cornbread has no white flour nor sugar, only coarse ground yellow corn meal, bacon fat, salt, soda and buttermilk. And, we both recalled having regular family meals, as children, of ham hocks, navy beans, sliced purple onions, chow-chow and, of course, cornbread. All this is generally served with chilled buttermilk, ice water or sweet tea, your choice and sometimes you have all three yourself in the course of the meal. I can't recall in detail all that we talked about standing in the parking lot for nearly three hours but it ranged from the best routes around the traffic in the major areas of congestion to parenting practices.

Now after a mile and half round trip by foot along the
Turkey Creek Greenway to the Wal-Mart Super Center I'm blessedly back in my air conditioned truck where the air is down in the high seventies and relatively dry, outside at five this evening it is still in the high nineties and even though the NWS shows the relative humidity at under fifty percent it's still seems "wet" outside to me. Perhaps lumping my week's supply of groceries back to the truck just made me work a little harder than usual or it is just damp along Turkey Creek. You don't realize what a half gallon of milk, eight packs of yogurt, a half gallon of orange juice, a half pound of pepper cheese, a pound of crackers, two rolls of paper towels, a half dozen bananas, four apples and a few other odds and ends really weighs until you pack it three quarters of a mile over the blazing asphalt back to your house. Now it's time to attend to some tedious financial issues just like last year at this time. And then, naptime until about six local time tomorrow morning when I'll set out to cover the last six miles to my destination. Living in forty eight square feet is interesting especially when you realize that you have to get a bed, first and foremost, into that six by eight foot area. But the adjoining office is only a single pace away and it's a spacious thirty two square feet, four by eight feet, with a very nice picture window view on three sides, high up where you can see what's going on. Three years off the road and now a full year back on the road. Yes, I'm back.

What Really Matters

Did you ever want somebody back?
Not necessarily
in the way
that you might have had them before?
And, this is really sorry language , this had
this verbal talisman of possession.
But anyway, let's just suppose
that you want to revive a relationship
with somebody.

And,
so you start to chat 'em up
and maybe even direct them to
right here.
Well, if you're here,
this is where you're supposed to be.

Did I wound you?
Uh huh.
Deeply?
Yaep.
Am I sorry?
Uh huh.
Does that change anything?
Nope.

But, what's important,
I think,
is that somehow
my behavior
can demonstrate to you,
hopefully over an extended period of time,
that the faith and trust that you once placed in me was not misguided.
And,
that within whatever limits you would like to set for any further interaction,
I am prepared, as well as committed,
to perform.
Perform to your satisfaction.

And, that's
what really matters.